Ice Quing @winter@rage.love

It has been genuinely freeing to realize that I actually am kinda crazy and that's okay.

My craziness often helps me be artistically or ethically creative in ways I wouldn't stumble on without it.

When my craziness impairs my quality of life, I at least don't have self-hate for being crazy on top of everything else.

Being okay (not perfectly happy, just okay) with being crazy is itself crazy, and you know what, it's great and I recommend it to everyone.

If you’ve liked my recent posts on white fragility and have any income, please consider donating to @ArtistMarciaX@playvicious.social - my intellectualized articulation of antiblack racism on the fedi is their actual lived experience.

Subscribe to their art here: https://www.artistmarciax.com/subscriptions
Another way to make a monthly contribution: https://en.liberapay.com/ArtistMarciaX/
Make a one time payment here (minimum donation €5): https://www.gofundme.com/f/on-the-road-to-phd

If you’re nonblack and you can’t donate, then you can’t. You don’t have to beat yourself up about it - that doesn’t help you or anyone else. But also don’t attack black people on the fedi for having needs or expressing emotions. Don’t make your limitations black people’s problem.

60 people favorited or boosted my post. If all those people donated €5 to Marcia’s GoFundMe, that would be €300. That would certainly be a start.

I can't promise that I will never make a mistake.

I also can't promise that I can improve my actions in response to call-ins or call-outs. Some of this is due to mental illness and disability reducing my ability to do *anything*, but whatever my reasons/excuses, that doesn't negate harm I do or make it invalid for people to be angry at or disappointed in me.

I try to look for cues that my input is unneeded/unwanted before I add to it. I can back off if I've been previously aggressive or derailing in a discussion, and I respect people putting up boundaries around interacting with me (whether that be an explicit request to not interact, or a nonverbal but clear signal like being blocked).

Will add more to this thread as needed.

Does anyone have any advice for running an online #mutualaid group? It's one thing to start one; it's another thing to make it sustainable and as helpful as possible to those who really need it. "Start a Facebook group!" advice overlooks security and logistics issues with the site. A public mutual aid group I joined was quickly overwhelmed by too many posts and was predated upon by a bad actor. Really REALLY want to avoid similar issues if I end up organizing.

Pitfalls of organizing: perfectionism, sense of urgency, defensiveness, quantity over quality, worship of the written word, paternalism, either/or thinking, power hoarding, fear of open conflict, individualism, progress is bigger/more, objectivity, and right to comfort.

From White Supremacy Culture
From Dismantling Racism: A Workbook for Social Change Groups, by Kenneth Jones and Tema Okun, ChangeWork, 2001.

http://cwsworkshop.org/PARC_site_B/dr-culture.html

I’m going to be a little unnuanced and sweeping here, but:

Anymore, I get frustrated when leftists talk about “when the revolution comes”, as if revolution isn’t already here and ongoing.

Like. How are the George Floyd BLM protests, the Standing Rock and Wet’suwet’en protests, the various anti-cop autonomous zones, the communal squatters in Philadelphia, the 250 million-person strike in India, and waay more I’m missing, NOT revolutionary or NOT part of a revolution?

Revolution isn’t and can’t be a singular event. And passively waiting for a nonexistent One True Revolution is both self-defeating and disrespectful to people who are already doing the work.

Re “disability existing or not after capitalism”:

I am sympathetic to multiple “sides” (social vs medical model) of the argument here.

Suffering will never go away completely even in a progressive society. In that sense I am sympathetic to the “medical model” people.

But at the same time, I often feel like people who say “I’ll still be disabled after capitalism” seriously underestimate how different things would be after capitalism.

I struggle a lot with sensory overwhelm and executive dysfunction as a neurodivergent person now, and I’m sure I still would struggle with it in the post-capitalist future.

BUT... so much of my struggle is due specifically to 1. how capitalism monopolizes the time and energy of other people who might otherwise be helping take care of me, 2. how capitalism punishes people for failure to “self-regulate” after withholding the resources (love and care) that are necessary to do so, and 3. how the valuation of disabled people under capitalism as worthless fills me with trauma and despair preventing me from getting out of bed in the morning.

In this sense I am more sympathetic to the “social model” people.

Idk. I just seem to have a different pov than a lot of disabled people I’ve seen on this.

Passing on a gofundme from a friend of a friend - Tony is a queer man in San Francisco trying to make rent so he doesn’t end up homeless this winter. $2000 goal.

https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-me-survive-the-season

Me calling my reps to beg them to do the bare minimum for other human beings: H-hewwo Mr Senator

Tatiana needs $100 to get food and travel by Greyhound Bus from Vermont to NYC.

Anything helps, especially to help her eat!
Venmo @Tatiana-Toplitz18

Black Socialists of America on birdsite seem pretty cool